Saturday, January 8, 2011

"I'll Take 'Books in a Series' for 400, Alex"

"I hate suspense, really I do. I like to know what's happening at all times and to whom, especially if it is to me." ~Michael Thomas Ford

I love, love, love Michael Thomas Fords' writing and have since reading the books of his syndicated column "My Queer Life", but enough about MT Ford for now...I'll save him for a different post. Instead I want to talk about book series.

In short, I can't stand them.
To elaborate, I can't stand them because they make me wait.
To clarify, I hate waiting.

I don't read books in a series until a series is complete finished. I read the first six Harry Potter books in six days, waited in line the day the 7th came out, bought it and then read it that day. I haven't started the Percy Jackson books...I hear they're not finished. When I was a kid I stopped reading The Sweet Valley books because they never stop. People have told me that I would love The Outlander series, but Diana Gabaldon won't stop writing...6th book, 7th book, 8th book...ah, geez!!! I read Twilight on a flight to DC, Eclipse on the return home, bought New Moon and Breaking Dawn at Border's with a friend (you know who you are Julie Andrews) and read them both the same day as soon as I got home. I haven't read the Lemony Snicket books, don't know if they're truly finished. I've never started reading Romance novels on a regular basis, don't even get me started about my need to collect, and those Harlequin ones are numbered and I'd want all the numbers. I only started reading the Dune books, after I researched and realized there were only so many that Frank Herbert actually wrote, I'm only reading the Frank Herbert ones (I told a Barnes and Noble cashier, I hope they're called cashiers, and not some cute name like barista, and he said I was making a wise choice). I read Patricia Cornwell's Kay Scarpetta novels because I choose to ignore the back stories and focus on the murders and forensics.

But, enough about my need for control and dominance.

Only after finding out that Stieg Larsson was no longer with us and that all the books had been published, did I begin to look at The Girl series. I bought the books (one in paper back, the others on the Nook), I was excited, I was going to have a series to read over the summer (as I could tell from the first paragraph it was going to take me longer to read each book than the day afforded to a Rowling or Meyer)...and, then, I started to read the first book (so excited!) as I got past the part with the mysterious flower, and finally began reading about the main character Mikael Blomkvist, I heard and then I read and then I became leery of the fact that there may be another book out there.

I will not pick the book back up until I'm certain that there isn't.
I will not watch the movies until I know there are no more books.

Yes, I am aware that I may have a slight problem...

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